Adam is confused. It hurt itself in the confusion!

Butthurt Turtles Fans.

By now, you may have seen the news that Michael Bay is planning to re-invent the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in a way that is leaving a lot of fans what can only be described as ‘butthurt’.

If you’re angry that Michael Bay and his team are changing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle’s back-story, but you also paid to see any of the Transformer movies, you deserve it. You did this. You allowed this evil to inhabit the world. Shame on you. You can’t have it both ways.

What exactly did you think he was going to do with all that cash from the countless number of moronic films he’s been involved with? Did you think “I guess he’s finally completed his magnum-opus with Transformers 3. Now his life work is complete!”.

You thought your franchise was safe, from the man who produced the Nightmare on Elm Street remake? Did you see that film? Dreadful.

So the Turtle’s are now aliens, and God-knows what Splinter will be, but my guess is that he’ll just be a bum whose beard is often chewed on by neighbourhood rodents. Am I mad? Let me re-phrase that. Am I surprised? Am I bothered? No. I did grow up watching the television series, I watched the movies, I even got a photo with Donatello when I was on holiday. Everyone says they’d be Donatello when it comes to choosing which Turtle you’d be, only you’re all wrong, because I’d be Donatello, not you.

But does it matter? Quite frankly, I think it does. Peter Parker was bit by a radioactive spider, that’s pretty much cut and dry. Some character backgrounds can be jiggled around. How many different origins has Catwoman had? No seriously, I don’t know. The story of some pet turtles winding up mutating in the New York sewers is fine enough as it is. There isn’t much to change, just throw in a few costly CGI transforming (pun intended) shots and you’re done. I don’t think anyone wants a new origin for these characters, and it’s certainly not needed.

But if it does happen, if it does come to pass that Leonardo and the gang will in fact be simply members of an alien race, then even if you’ve given £1 to Michael Bay, you’ll be at fault. You can no longer complain, you’ll just have to sit back and enjoy. The man has been likened to Hitler, and your only problem is Leonardo is now from space? Cowabunga, dude. Just go with it. If it sucks, it sucks, and it’ll be remade. Everything is remade and reinvented and distorted along the way, but that’s just how it is. Nobody will make you watch it, just like nobody made you watch Armageddon or Peal Harbour.

I kept asking Clarence why our world seemed to be collapsing and things seemed to be getting so shitty. And he’d say, “that’s the way it goes, but don’t forget, it goes the other way too.”

Just, y’know, make sure Michael Bay stays away from my favourite franchises

p.s: I had a thing for April O’Neil. She was easily up there with Judy Jetson as hottest cartoon girls from my youth.

I watched the first episode of The New Twilight Zone today, the 1985 revival series, not the original.

Originally, I was really pumped after watching the first story, which had Bruce Willis (with hair) phoning his house and some weird, nega-verse, alter-ego of his, played by Bruce Willis, answering. This Bruce Willis takes over old Bruce Willis’ life. Real weird story. The minute I finished watching it I was like, oh, I should tell people about how cool this story was.

But then I watched the second story, titled ‘A Little Piece and Quiet’. and I was blown away. It was a remake of one of the original series’ episodes, but still, it’s brilliant in it’s own right. It stars Melinda Dillon, a wife and mother who carries the weight and responsibilities of her family. Like a lot of mums, she’s expected to be the problem solver for everything. She comes across a necklace that can freeze time and, yeah, shit gets real bad ass. Like, the ending was pretty cool, but I’ll let you watch that to find out.

Both shorts were directed by Wes Craven, and have some pretty obvious nods to older films throughout, but you should definitely watch the episode I’ve put here. Although I do think that The Twilight Zone just wouldn’t work nowadays (as people are on the whole pretty vapid and tasteless - true fact), the episodes from the different incarnations of the show are pretty good lessons in writing a contained story.

In other news, should I get a Pinterest? It seems to be everywhere, and I guess with Tumblr I just feel I don’t need it. Then again, I gave up reblogging on the whole a while ago. Whatever, right?

This is one of those ‘things you overhear when in a public space’ type of posts.

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Goodison Park, Everton vs. Tottenham on Flickr.

Goodison Park, Everton vs. Tottenham

The Living Room - Volume 1

musiclivingroom:

So, in case you’ve never been here before, The Living Room is basically a really crappy blog we sporadically update. We mainly find mash-ups and remixes on Youtube and Soundcloud and link you to that.

The idea came from the fact that we (we being Adam and Ryan, hello!) used to share a flat in East London. Not just the two of us mind you. One of our favourite things to do was to sit around and play each other music, whether that be on the record player or a track we’d found online. Between us, our taste is a little eclectic, but it’s real fun, as you’ll know, to discover something and show it to your friend.

So we’ve made a Spotify playlist of stuff we like. We’ve been trying to do this for a while now, but distance, other projects, life and laziness always got in the way. So, like, listen to it if you’re feeling down, or trying to do work, or setting up a party, or even drinking alone in your room…

There’s some old stuff, some real new stuff, a lot of electro and synth-pop, but some cool remixes we could never get enough of.

So, thanks. We might make a Volume 2 for summer, a real summer essential thing…I don’t know. We’ll see what happens.

I think we’ve set Asks to work, but there’s a thousand different ways to contact us if you want to say “I loved it!” or “Between you, you have absolutely no taste”. Happy listening.

Good times!

A few months ago I got a copy of.Avengers The Origin, and the Ebay seller sent me this 1973 Avengers with it. Its one of the most off the wall stories I’ve read. Basically, Zemo is a bad boy Nazi scientist working on creating the worlds strongest…adhesive. Frightening stuff! Cap’ busts in and pops the glue, sticking a naff mask to Zemo’s head. Zemo’s idea of revenge us to recruit Melter, Black Knight and Radioactive Man to spread more adhesive everywhere.

I mean, as far as dastardly, evil plans go, spreading glue everywhere is pretty laughable. Still, fun read!

“Hey Adam, can you show me a video of one of your favourite songs?”

“Yeah sure, no problem”

….

“Adam, why have you shown me a really crappy slideshow video of ‘Two Perfect Girls’, as sang by the character Brock from Pokemon?”

“Well, you asked-“

“Are you serious?!”

“I’m very serious”

So here we are, my Oscar picks. Do I believe half my picks will be right? Hell no. I’ve gone for a mixture of what I think the academy will go for with who I think should get it, with a healthy dose of ‘pick one at random’ thrown in. Will Bridesmaids win original script? Nope, but I’d like to think it will. Best actor - George Clooney? Maybe, I mean he was good in the Descendents but I just feel they won’t give everything to The Artist. Meryl Streep is a cert, she wins everything…

I don’t think Tree of Life will win Cinematography but it was pretty beautiful…

So yeah, lots of guesswork but as always, I’m excited for the event! Rise of the Planet of the Apes deserved way more than just Visual Effects, Serkis was amazing, but…whatever. Y’all made yer picks, or don’t you care?

Last night I sat down to watch a film. Shocker, I know. Can you imagine!?

For some reason I decided to ignore all the flashy stuff Sky Movies were trying to throw at me, and decided to finally watch the 1967 Kramer film ‘Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner’, starring Sidney Poitier, Katharine Hepburn, Spencer Tracy and Katharine Houghton.

I mean, there isn’t much to say about it all that hasn’t already been said. It’s a funny, witty, poignant piece of cultural history that transcends the screen. If anyone wants to know what the term ‘good acting’ means, point them back to this classic.

Compared to the terrible remake ‘Guess Who’, it doesn’t rely on displaying ridiculous, over-the-top stereotypes of certain characters to emphasize the differences between the two families. It also doesn’t have Ashton Kutcher in it, which is my most basic request for anything. “Hey Adam, you should watch ______” “Does it feature Ashton Kutcher post-That 70’s Show?” “Yes” “No way!”.

Anyway, I did a little research beforehand and came across the story that Spencer Tracy died 17 days after filming had been completed. Tracy and Hepburn were such old friends, she used to drive him to set. Apparently, in the scene above, the tears in Hepburn’s eyes were genuine, as she knew Spencer was frail, and his whole speech about how love lasts through the years got to her.

Well, it got to me to, after knowing that piece of trivia. I was so choked up by the end. It’s such a good movie, and I know I say this a lot, but I just wish cinema was more like this than like 70% of the stuff out in the local multiplex. You should definitely watch this film.

First time I’ve played this since I was given it on my, like, 18th birthday perhaps?

So good.

Top 3 Date Movies for Valentines Day.

Valentines Day means one thing to me; it’s officially 24 hours till my birthday. This year however it’s also 24 hours till my two friends Kyle and Ryan appear on Bargain Hunt, so set your Sky+ for Wednesday’s episode, unless you don’t like Bargain Hunt, in which case please close this tab in your browser now. (edit: the episode got moved to Monday. Dang!)

February 14th is a day that people give each other shit the shops shove out, that’s a fact. A projected social image. Y’know, it’s like, surely everyone can’t enjoy all this flowers/chocolates/love hearts business, right? Surely you suckers who will be ‘celebrating’ tomorrow in some fashion could be a little creative? You know what says love? A travelcard for the week. It’s useful and it says ‘baby, I’m looking out for you’. Hopeless romantic, I know.

So this is how you’re night will probably go tomorrow. I know how shit like this goes down because I can read your minds like Charles Xavier. You might meet up with your beloved, maybe exchange some tacky-ass gift. Are you cooking, or is your partner? Maybe you’re ordering in, in which case, Jesus buddy, a takeaway? Cla55y.

If you’re a sub-human cretin, maybe you went to see The Vow for Valentines Day, in which case I implore you to die. You honestly looked at the trailer and thought “that looks good!”. Guy tip: If you take your girl to see this film, you may be thinking “this will get me in her good books!”, but you’re exposing her to Hollywood pretty boy Channing Tatum. The film will end, the lights will come up, and then she’ll have to look at your ugly mug the rest of the night. Don’t set yourself up for defeat. (Originally this rant was aimed at This Means War, McG’s most recent diabolical offering. However, it’s only being released on the 17th. Why would they choose to release a romantic comedy, but miss the Valentines Day crowds?)

Once all that shit is done, maybe you’ll cap your night off with a DVD. You know what I mean. “Oh, let’s just watch a film! Oh you’re tired, me too!”. I know how shit works. Contrary to belief I am human. Anyway, here’s a list of three films you should be watching on this insanely stupid day:

Road House

Every stupid girl loves Patrick Swayze. Pop culture dictates they do, and they follow suit. I’m not saying every girl likes the Swayz, but ask a girl what her favourite movies are, and whether it’s a guilty pleasure or they’re proud as hell of it, Dirty Dancing and Ghost will be up there. I know, I don’t understand it either, but this is just how things are.

You know how to tell if a girl is cool as hell? If she says her favourite Patrick Swayze film is Road House. Road House is pretty bad ass. I promise you, of the three Swayze films previously mentioned, this is the only one you can sit through. For that reason, you can perfectly work this one into your film selection for the evening. “You know, I heard about this really nice film we could watch…it’s got the guy from Dirty Dancing in…oh, you like him? Let’s watch it then!”. Before you know it, bar-room brawling. Yeehaw.

True Romance

This is just a good fucking movie.

Gran Torino

Ladies love the Hobbit-boy Jamie Cullum (he was part of the soundtrack). Guys love it when Clint Eastwood is in bad ass mode. EVERYONE can appreciate Gran Torino. Sure, it might get a tad uncomfortable. Christ knows nothing kills the romantic mood than a lot of racist terminology for Koreans. I won’t spoil it, but by the end you can turn to your partner and say “I’d do that for you, y’know”. If they ask what you meant by that, don’t even try to explain, because I’m pretty sure none of the actions of the film could be applied to situations in your life. Just bone.

Whatever you decide to do, whether you’re in a relationship or you’ll be feeling completely alone to the point that it eats away at your soul (too personal?), don’t forgot it’s my 23rd the day after, and that Valentines Day pales in comparison to the anniversary of my glorious birth.

I won! I’d like to thank the academy of best friends for this honour. on Flickr.

I won! I’d like to thank the academy of best friends for this honour.

The video we shot for Jethro Fox’s song ‘Before’ dropped yesterday.
I do despise the term ‘dropped’ for a video but I guess it’s appropriate…
It made it’s debut on Fake DIY. If you probe hard enough into the archives of that site I crop up there many moons ago, but I’ll let you do the investigating on that one…

Watch the video, see what you think. I’m pretty proud I was involved in the whole thing. Everyone was chill as hell on the day (including me, as always) and as a result, good things happened.

I went to the FACT Cinema in Liverpool yesterday to see Carnage, the new Roman Polanski film. Interesting (the use of this term being debatable depending on how interested in my pathetic existence you are…) fact; the last time I went to  FACTwas on a college trip to watch Hotel Rwanda. I used to do a mean Don Cheadle impression. Afterwards we went to Subway. It was such a cheery day. Steak and Cheese on Hearty Italian mixed with genocide and tyranny, my favourites!

Thankfully, Carnage was nothing like Hotel Rwanda. A lot less bloodshed, guns, and Don Cheadle. You can go look up the finer details of the plot, but it basically involves two couples forced to meet after their sons get into a playground scrap. It was absolutely hilarious. I am no fan of Jodie Foster or Kate Winslet, but it’s hard to fault their performances at all. John C. Reilly and the amazing Christoph Waltz were on such good form, but it’s rare you ever see them do wrong anyway.

With the whole film being set in just the one apartment, I think it definitely proved that movies don’t have to jump from location to location just to keep the attention of the audience, that it really is down to the writing and familiarity of character’s emotions to us. It was so fun to see the two couples as they present themselves to strangers, yet over the course of the film, their layers of decency slowly tear away one argument at a time.

Honestly, I had so much fun watching Carnage. I would watch it again right now if I could. Everyone was so unique and had certain traits that played against each other so well, it was a strange delight to see. Plus, no one drove down a road over loads of dead bodies in Rwanda. Always a plus for any film.

So, The White Star in Liverpool is this old as shit pub filled with old as shit people. It’s quite cosy and the beer is nice, which makes it very redeemable. Anyway, the walls inside are full of Beatles stuff and loads of paintings and photos of old boats. Cruise liners and…other types. Giant-ass old boats really do nothing for me, but according to a friend, the Titanic was built by the White Star Line. Get out, you say? No, this is my place of documentation.

I guess it explains all the boat malarkey dotted around the place. I must stress this is a nice pub. Y’know, last time I was in the Wetherspoons nearby, they rang the fire alarm and told us to go get breakfast at McDonalds instead? That really happened. I have witnesses. Why was I at a Wetherspoons for breakfast a few weeks ago? Because this is how I roll with my chums (real and imaginary). Wetherspoons would do well to take note of the cheery barkeep in the White Star.

If you go into the beer ‘garden’ at The White Star, which is effectively four walls and some ancient concrete flagging, you will see the walls painted with some really cool stuff about the Titanic. Oh shit, did this get controversial? Uh huh. In the harsh red light of the outdoor heater, it all looks pretty sweet.

But I do take issue with that drawing of ‘Ismay’. I’m pretty sure a Jawa didn’t make it on board the Titanic…

I’m hardly the greatest at drawing (in fact, I’m what the soft sciences refer to as ‘a retard with a pen’ while doodling), but that’s a pretty horrific depiction of the man.

Make your own mind up, but I’m right.

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